In her debut memoir, Togher presents wrenching and honest meditations on how to live after the passing of someone you love. When Togher’s daughter Suzanne was 8 years old and reeling from the death of a close family friend, Suzanne said to her mother: “...if I ever die, I will never leave you...We will always be together—we will make a pact.” Thirty-one years later, Suzanne passed away after a series of health complications. Togher’s memoir details her conviction that Suzanne kept their pact, and she offers what she sees as Suzanne’s communications from the spirit world—the “physical phenomena, sights, odors, movement of objects, and the playful use of lights”—as case studies for readers seeking ways to cope with loss. She encourages readers to be “open to the possibilities of the universe” and to interpret, say, a penny on the sidewalk as a message of support.

To some, death is a taboo subject, but Togher writes of her experience with courage and deep emotional intelligence. Her memoir reads as a therapeutic expression of her grief, a practical guide for readers seeking comfort after loss, and a celebration of Suzanne’s life. Togher gives concrete advice about her own grieving process, but also affirms that people grieve differently. While she feels spiritually connected to Suzanne still, and gives ample examples of how she has maintained contact with her in Spirit, she recognizes that “not everyone will wish to, or try to, see or hear messages from the other side of the veil” and acknowledges that that “is perfectly okay.”

Togher emphasizes the ways that someone can deepen their relationship to a loved one who has passed through automatic writing exchanges, mediums, and the messages that she calls “postcards” that suggest a presence and affirm that death does not mean someone is truly gone. Togher exemplifies how “the grief of your loss really can be made manageable and perhaps even turn to joy.”

Takeaway: Readers facing loss will find comfort and beauty in Togher’s enlightening approach to grief.

Great for fans of: Gail Caldwell’s Let’s Take the Long Way Home, Laura Lynn Jackson’s Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe.

Production grades
Cover: A
Design and typography: A-
Illustrations: N/A
Editing: A-
Marketing copy: A